Hello, Teagan Jayne :: Part I

Teagan_Birthday  This one's for Teagan. To remember the day she was born.

 If I told you that 5:45 Sunday morning, September 6, 2009, arrived in an eyeblink, quicker than thought, quicker even than acceptance of eight-plus months of denial could evaporate - you probably wouldn't be surprised. There will be only one day in my life where I wake up and say, "I'm having a baby today."

Grunting and skootching out of bed, lugging my belly, I push off with my arms to regain homo erectus status, trying not to wake Makenna, sleeping soundly by my side. There are definitely things I won't miss about being pregnant. And perhaps more surprisingly, more that I will - utterly unexplicable things, sensations, unformed primal thoughts that tether us back to the wild and to the baby inside. I feel calm where I'd felt nerves the night before. 

(No food, no coffee, no water for 8 hours) + (Pregnant lady) = Look Out, World

We spent the week in a feverish sprint to the finish line, with work, chores, baby preparations. Disinfecting this. Stocking up on that. I felt like we were stocking our fallout shelter, and only just managed to finish packing before placing our bags so tidily at the front door. "We look like we're leaving for vacation," I smirk to myself.

We're running late, so mom swoops in to pick up Makenna. Uncle John and cousins Livia and Kaio await. Kenna has hours of mayhem ahead of her; she's not the only one.

The Varmint and I arrive at the hospital and are ushered into a labor room, where I'm stripped by Pam our peppy British nurse and IV'd and drowned in paperwork for the first hour. We joke with Dr. Dunn, our chatty, upbeat, funky-glasses-wearing OB/GYN.

DSC_0503"Ha ha ha, isn't funny that you're going to be elbow-deep in my guts within the next couple of hours?" I hear myself yammer nervously. He provides a smiling, but more solemn response: "I prefer to think that I'll be presenting you with your baby." Yeeeaaaah. 

I'd argue that laughs go further in the anxiety-squelching department, but I suppose when it comes to surgeons, I'll take focus over rubber chickens.

Good Hair, Bad Juju
Anyway, as they start to load me up with IV fluids, I joke with the nurses. This time around, it being a planned birth and all, I'd had my hair washed and blown-out - since post-ceasarean it's not the easiest thing to manage. The 'do hadn't looked this good in weeks.

Later, we are informed (drip-drip-drip) we will be delayed (drip-drip) as some lady with twins is delivering in the operating room, "Safety first!" says Dr. Dunn. Everyone seems worried about me worrying about the delay.  Frankly, I couldn't care less. She's got twice the trouble; she can take my operating room. The trick for me with dealing with stress is to give myself over to it; there's nothing I can do to change anything. Why muck things up with a crappy attitude?

DSC_0510As is the usual deal, they start to load me up with fluids, but not the good kind. Coffee IV, anyone? Nooo, instead I get Pitocin, the nasty hormone that fakes the body out that it's birth-time. My body's natural reaction is DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO, but resigns itself to the situation. Within two hours, Shannon will be dressed in his Hazmat suit and I'll be on the table, numb from the chest down, hurling uncontrollably - but hey, we don't know that yet.

Uncomfortably Numb
It's a creepy feeling, getting that spinal, all alone in the O.R. with the anesthesiologist doing the whole "talk to keep them calm" thing. Let's face it, lady - nothing masks that sinking, claustrophobic, crushing feeling of the needle sliding in between your vertebrae. There is an indescribable wrongness to it. I thought that would be the worst of things, and said so to the doc. She laughingly agreed with me.

We'd be wrong.


Part II is next...


  1. Christy said on March 2, 2010 16:04

    I look forward to part 2. Welcome back to the blog world, Tam. We've missed you!

  2. Darci said on April 1, 2010 06:21

    I'd like to read Part II as well!

  3. Darci said on April 1, 2010 06:21

    I'd like to read Part II as well!


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I am a writer and lazy artist who loves travel, architecture and design. Right now, I'm into photography. My fabulous husband (a.k.a. The Varmint) and I are also the principals of a San Diego-based creative agency - and new parents to the divine Baby Mak. Read More >