Another Reason I'm Thrilled to Be Female

So this morning, I wake up, pull on my fuzzy bathrobe and flop to the Secondary Horizontal Surface - also known as The Couch.

It's a few hours before The Varmint shuffles out of the Primary Horizontal Surface (yes, that would be The Bed - you catch on quick), walrus-faced, mumbling and sporting puffy, red-rimmed eyeslits. He smooches me on the cheek and stumbles onward in the general direction of the kitchen.

For a solid couple of minutes, I hear nothing. This, I realize is the sound of The Varmint coming to full consciousness, a sort of preparatory state for any actual action that might lie ahead.

Next, I hear the cupboard opening and the thick "chunk" of a coffee mug being pulled clumsily from the shelf and plunked down. I hear the dirty coffee pot leaving its nest. Any second, I'll hear sink water rushing to swish out the carafe...

Instead, I hear the sound of the microwave door opening, closing.

"Um, Shannon?" I call, "do my ears deceive me, or did you just pour skanky day-old coffee into your mug to reheat in the microwave in order to avoid the brutal exhaustion of making a fresh pot?"



"Ummmmm," comes The Varmint's reply, his head poking sheepishly from the kitchen. "Gimme a second. I'm trying to think of an answer."


  1. youngling said on August 10, 2007 03:50

    This I have done. It was common practice in my home to have 2 coffee pots, one for fresh coffee, the second for remainder coffee. I am prone to use remainder coffee as it has more of a kick... You may say that this is a disgusting and revolting habit, but I disagree. Two-day-old flavored coffee is near nirvana for me.

  2. The Varmint said on August 10, 2007 11:33

    See I told you day old coffee was good. But noooooooOOOoooooo, you wouldn't believe me!


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I am a writer and lazy artist who loves travel, architecture and design. Right now, I'm into photography. My fabulous husband (a.k.a. The Varmint) and I are also the principals of a San Diego-based creative agency - and new parents to the divine Baby Mak. Read More >