Nyuck Nyuck, Nyuck, Nyuck

Today we received an email chain from Justin, also known as Brother of Varmint.  To say that The Varmint and Justin have a bad case of sibling rivalry is like saying you or I suffer from a bad case of breathing: They may be pushing 40, but emotionally, they're still pushing Tonka Trucks.

You can't turn around without one going extreme, full-contact, no-holds barred "neener" on the other. It might be "Duh-ing" the other person til they finally break, drive-by gassing, gloating about an epic surf session, or eating the center of some tasty treat - and leaving the sad, saliva-ed outer shell as a decoy to ensnare his foe.

It'd be scary if it weren't such a great spectator sport. They've livened up many a familial event, so I'm not about to discourage their behavior. They're a primary source of entertainment.

Often, our Thanksgivings are a blending of our two families. It's a full-participation affair, everybody brings something. With three great cooks, it works out fantastically well for those of us who like to eat.

This year, Justin's making pies. (Bless him. The man can bake.) He took the day off today for piemaking. He also knew that The Varmint was working.

Email One - 12:15 p.m. - Lunch Hour

"This is a test of the emergency pie making network. This is only a test. In the event of an actual emergency, you will be directed to go to the table for the real pie event. This pie is defective because the spiced blueberry filling bubbled up in several spots, unacceptable by any standards. My bad. We are currently disposing of this pie... with vanilla ice cream."

Email Two - 3:19p.m. - From Justin's Wife, Tina

(Tina, by the way, is a Woman of Very Few Words who we thought was of higher moral fiber than to be sucked into her husband's evil shenanigans. Shame. Shaaaaaaame.)

"I awoke from my nap to find this..."

Email Three - 5:44p.m. "Mmmmm....slurp....urf....ahhhhhhh."

 Let the holidays begin. Opening score: Justin - 1 Varmint - 0 (I can't wait until tomorrow.)


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I am a writer and lazy artist who loves travel, architecture and design. Right now, I'm into photography. My fabulous husband (a.k.a. The Varmint) and I are also the principals of a San Diego-based creative agency - and new parents to the divine Baby Mak. Read More >